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Category Archive for: ‘Couples’

Working Alone to Improve Your Relationship – Taking a look at yourself

This is the second post in our “Working Alone to Improve Your Relationship” series Working alone on a relationship problem can mean that you have to take a look at your own issues and your contribution to the difficulties with your partner. While this challenge is not always easy, the payoff in terms of your own emotional wellness can be …

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Creating a Sucessful Relationship

This is the first post in our series on “Working Alone to Improve Your Relationship” You Can Create a Successful Relationship – Even If You Must Do It Alone Conflicts can be expected to arise in even the strongest of relationships. Two people who attempt to create a relationship always bring their own issues, backgrounds, expectations, personalities, and inner difficulties …

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Arguing Constructively: Dirty Fighting

marriage counseling: couple arguing

When you use dirty fighting techniques to win an argument, both you and your partner ultimately lose! Communication Patterns You Should Avoid   Escalating Here you quickly move from the main issue of the argument to questioning your partner’s basic personality, and then move on to wondering whether the relationship is even worth it. Timing This involves catching your partner …

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Arguing Constructively: Constructive Relationship Guidelines

Constructive Relationship Guidelines In addition to reaching a good understanding of the nature of the commitment, there are several other guidelines that can be explored when a couple decides to bring their arguments to a more constructive level. It is better to be close and happy than to be right. Blaming each other and trying to change the other person’s …

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Arguing Constructively: Clarify Your Level of Commitment to the Relationship

Constructive Relationship Guidelines If arguments begin to have a deteriorating effect on a relationship and no resolution appears in sight, it is time to examine the level of commitment each of the partners has to the relationship. This is sometimes a basic issue that remains unresolved by two partners. People avoid this topic out of fear that their partner may …

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Couples Arguing Constructively

A Good Argument Has Its Up Side – But Only If We Fight Fairly All couples argue. This is a normal and expected part of any relationship. Of course, some relationship experts say that arguing is healthy, while others say beware. While an occasional argument might be unavoidable and can even ultimately clarify boundaries within the relationship, a pattern of …

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Finding Intimacy: The Ability To Trust

It is difficult to achieve intimacy in a relationship unless we have the ability to trust. We tend to focus on other people when we think about trust – that is, we might ask, who out there can be trusted and who cannot? But it may be more helpful to look inside and to think about trust also as something …

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Finding Intimacy: The Healthy Benefits of Intimacy

A number of research studies have shown persuasively that people in intimate relationships live longer and happier lives than those who are not. For example, we know that people in marriages or other committed relationships live longer than people who are single. In one classic study researchers found that 95 percent of people who described their parents as uncaring had …

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Finding Intimacy: How Do We Reach Intimacy?

Each person seems to understand the intimate experience in his or her own way. In a sense it takes a journey of personal discovery to learn how to share intimacy with another person. Here are some guidelines that may help to define that journey– Know Your Self: Get in touch with your own private experiences. In our stressed-out world this …

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Building Intimacy in a relationship

Many people search for that special intimacy in their relationship. Some of us search our entire lives for a feeling of oneness with another person. It’s hard to describe, really, what we search for, but we know it when we finally achieve it. Maybe we tire of that dark feeling of being ultimately alone as we struggle through life. If …

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