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Category Archive for: ‘Relational Therapy’

Successful Couples – Part 6

Ask Your Partner to Help You Solve Your Problem Rather than blaming your partner and creating an air of defensiveness, try reframing the problem. Make it clear that you are the one having the difficulty, and ask for your partner’s help in solving your problem. For example, instead of blaming your partner for spending too much money, it might be …

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Successful Couples – Part 5

Relax Your Definitions of the Power Struggle When we are involved in a relationship conflict we often resort to all-or-nothing thinking, and it is difficult to think outside of this box – “I am right and my partner is wrong.” The more you insist on your point of view, the more your partner defends his or her position. The two …

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Successful Couples – Part 3

Take Care of Your Own Needs We often look to our partner to provide for our needs, and this can be a big mistake. People, whether they are in a relationship or not, need to function in a whole and complete manner. The best relationships are generally those in which two healthy and fully functioning adults come together and enhance …

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Damaging Relationship

One of the patterns I have noticed in the couples I have been working with lately is that they engage in judgment and condemnation instead of expressing their feelings. The scenario typically goes like this: One partner does or says something hurtful to the other but the hurt one does not own his/her feelings neither communicates sensibly about them but choose …

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Couples & Communication – Part 4

Exercise for Couples Reciprocal listening is a powerful tool for couples who need to improve their communication. Couples who try this may become aware of how limited their communication has been in the past. They also learn an effective technique, which can increase the respect, trust, and intimacy of their relationship. This exercise may seem structured and perhaps contrived at …

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Couples & Communication – Part 3

Obstacles to Good Listening Real listening is a skill that takes practice and an honest look into how you deal with the world. If you tend to take a distrustful or combative stance toward other people most of the time, it may be hard to engage in healthy and open listening. The same holds true if you need to please …

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Couples & Intimacy – Part 2

Each person seems to understand the intimate experience in his or her own way. In a sense it takes a journey of personal discovery to learn how to share intimacy with another person. Here are some guidelines that may help to define that journey– Know Your Self: Get in touch with your own private experiences. In our stressed-out world this …

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Couples & Intimacy – Part 1

BUILDING INTIMACY IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP Some of us search our entire lives for a feeling of oneness with another person. It’s hard to describe, really, what we search for, but we know it when we finally achieve it. Maybe we tire of that dark feeling of being ultimately alone as we struggle through life. If only there were someone else …

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Infidelity – Part 2

There are many types of affairs, and couples should consider this information before making a decision to dissolve a marriage or other committed relationship. Life Transitions Relationships go through stages involving loss and then gain – and each of these transitions is accompanied by anxiety. The birth of a child, career demands, middle age, and retirement are typical life transitions …

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Moral Children

Children develop moral motives, an inclination to care about others and treat them kindly and fairly, spontaneously and at a very young age. But they also develop aggressive, greedy and selfish motives. Both kinds of motives are part of every child’s nature and will create tension throughout the child’s life. However children’s moral motives are readily susceptible to moral instruction …

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