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Category Archive for: ‘Relational Therapy’

Couples & Intimacy- Part 4

It is difficult to achieve intimacy in a relationship unless we have the ability to trust. We tend to focus on other people when we think about trust – that is, we might ask, who out there can be trusted and who cannot? But it may be more helpful to look inside and to think about trust also as something …

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Couples & Intimacy- Part 3

A number of research studies have shown persuasively that people in intimate relationships live longer and happier lives than those who are not. For example, we know that people in marriages or other committed relationships live longer than people who are single. In one classic study researchers found that 95 percent of people who described their parents as uncaring had …

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Intimacy & Couples- Part 2

Each person seems to understand the intimate experience in his or her own way. In a sense it takes a journey of personal discovery to learn how to share intimacy with another person. Here are some guidelines that may help to define that journey– Know Your Self: Get in touch with your own private experiences. In our stressed-out world this …

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Intimacy & Couples- Part 1

Many people search for that special intimacy in their relationship. Some of us search our entire lives for a feeling of oneness with another person. It’s hard to describe, really, what we search for, but we know it when we finally achieve it. Maybe we tire of that dark feeling of being ultimately alone as we struggle through life. If …

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Couples, Conflicts & Fairness

Conflicts and disagreements are unavoidable. As long as relationships exist, conflicts and disagreements will always be part of them. As soon as you put two human beings together, you have two cultures, two backgrounds, two frame of reference, two mindset, two families of origin, two ways of doing things etc Depending of the family of origin and even the culture …

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Conflicts & Couples- Part 4

Communication Patterns You Should Avoid Escalating Here you quickly move from the main issue of the argument to questioning your partner’s basic personality, and then move to wondering whether the relationship is even worth it. Timing This involves catching your partner off guard., like looking for a time when your partner is least able to respond or least expects an …

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Conflicts & Couples- Part 3

Constructive Relationship Guidelines In addition to reaching a good understanding of the nature of the commitment, there are several other guidelines that can be explored when a couple decides to bring their arguments to a more constructive level. It is better to be close and happy than to be right. Blaming each other and trying to change the other person’s …

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Conflicts & Couples- Part 2

Constructive Relationship Guidelines If arguments begin to have a deteriorating effect on a relationship and no resolution appears in sight, it is time to examine the level of commitment each of the partners has to the relationship. This is sometimes a basic issue that remains unresolved by two partners. People avoid this topic out of fear that their partner may …

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Conflicts & Couples – Part 1

All couples argue. This is a normal and expected part of any relationship. Of course, some relationship experts say that arguing is healthy, while others say beware. While an occasional argument might be unavoidable and can even ultimately clarify boundaries within the relationship, a pattern of habitual fighting left unchecked puts the relationship at risk. Granted, when couples first meet, …

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Successful Marriage- Part 5

Relax Your Definitions of the Power Struggle When we are involved in a relationship conflict we often resort to all-or-nothing thinking, and it is difficult to think outside of this box – “I am right and my partner is wrong.” The more you insist on your point of view, the more your partner defends his or her position. The two …

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