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Category Archive for: ‘Relational Therapy’

Marriage & Infidelity- Part 1

The single most destructive threat to a committed relationship is when one of the partners engages in a sexual relationship with another person. This is not an uncommon event. Conservative estimates suggest that about a quarter of women, and a third of men, have violated their marital commitment to their partners. About 65 percent of marriages struck by infidelity end …

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Relationships & Anger

Throughout the western world, the popular wisdom has for many years been that anger should be expressed. It was seen as healthy. Clients were often advised even by therapists, to release, even unleash, their anger without any regard to the consequences on relationships. Anger was described by many psychotherapists as a strong feeling that when unexpressed, could be internalized and …

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Couples & Communication- Part 4

Exercise for Couples Reciprocal listening is a powerful tool for couples who need to improve their communication. Couples who try this may become aware of how limited their communication has been in the past. They also learn an effective technique, which can increase the respect, trust, and intimacy of their relationship. This exercise may seem structured and perhaps contrived at …

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Couples & Communication- Part 3

Obstacles to Good Listening Real listening is a skill that takes practice and an honest look into how you deal with the world. If you tend to take a distrustful or combative stance toward other people most of the time, it may be hard to engage in healthy and open listening. The same holds true if you need to please …

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Couples & Communication- Part 2

Become A Good Listener The first step in mastering good listening skills is to become aware of why listening is important in your life and your relationships. And the next step is simply to start doing it. Practice active listening whenever you can. Here are few rules to start the process: – Never interrupt when the other person is speaking. …

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Couples & Communication- Part 1

ACTIVE COMMUNICATION REQUIRES ONE PERSON TO TALK AND THE OTHER TO LISTEN..AND BOTH TO DO THEIR PART WELL Listening is the other half of communication. Our first though, when we think about communication, may be to consider the speaker’s ability to convey ideas effectively. What we forget is that without a listener the speaker may as well be talking to …

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Relationships & Forgiveness- Part 5

Forgiveness “to do” list ____Understand fully that forgiveness does not mean that it is all right for the aggressive behavior to ever be repeated. Forgiveness is meant for past behavior that was unacceptable. ____Give up the unrealistic hope that the perpetrator will apologize, answer your questions or be able to explain why he or she hurt you. Even if apologies …

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Relationships & Forgiveness- Part 3

Choosing to Forgive Forgiving the one who caused you harm may seem like the last thing you would want to do. After all, by not forgiving, you can hold onto the belief that you have some power over the perpetrator and that you can therefore prevent the harm from ever happening to you again. Or you may be so invested …

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Relationships & Forgiveness- Part 2

THE WAY WE ARE HURT The hurt can be enormous. Humiliation. When you are ridiculed by others – especially during childhood, as often happens when children are called derisive names – or when your pride is wounded, as might happen when a supervisor at work berates you in front of others, the assault on your dignity may impel you to …

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Relationships & Forgiveness- Part 1

“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” – Mahatma Gandhi All of us have been hurt, in one way or another, by someone else. While it is easy to forgive a friend for the slight distress one feels over a phone call that was not returned, it is not so easy to forgive those who …

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