Webster dictionary defines grief as: “ ..intense emotional suffering cause by loss, disaster, misfortune, etc; acute sorrow; deep sadness…”(from “Webster’s new World Dictionary”, Second Edition, copyright 2008). It is a natural response to loss. Grief happens to you and there is no way around. You have to go through it; it’s a process not an event. As Alan Wolfeit writes “ The grief within has its own heartbeat, its own life, its own song” . Some have described it as a confusing, painful, overwhelming even a frightening emotional roller-coaster ride.
Loss and grief are inevitable, painful human experiences that can change us.
Just by being alive, you are going to experience loss at one point or another in life. You can experience the loss of dreams, opportunities, health through disease or aging, wealth (through bad choices, a dishonest associate and/or economical conjunctures), loved ones (through separation, divorce and death), and death is part of everyone’s life.
Loss put us in touch with the reality that there are parts of our lives over which we have no control. Some healthy people get cancer, some partners that have done their very best to love their spouse are betrayed, a dishonest greedy business man chooses to turn a blind eye on illegal practices and numerous people loose their retirement plans, a drunk choose to drive and a family is devastated by the sudden death of a loved one.
However the way you deal with suffering, loss, and grief have the potential to change the way you value and experience life and others. If you allow it grief can strengthen you, deepens you and can be one of your greatest teachers. As West black says “seeds of wisdom are planted within the wounds of grief”.
You do not have to go through it alone. If your grief feels like too much to bear, a qualified therapist can help you work through intense emotions, learn to let go and grow through the pain.
I provide counseling in the convenient area of Sorrento Valley in San Diego, assisting children, adolescents and adults desiring support and direction in dealing with loss and grief. We also serve the surrounding areas of La Jolla, UTC San Diego, Del Mar, University City, Rancho Santa Fe, Rancho Bernardo, Rancho Penasquitos, Poway and Escondido.