By showing appreciation, we are essentially saying that the other person is worthy and has dignity. We declare that we can see the positive qualities of the other person. This message is crucial to emotional wellness because it is a core building block of self-esteem. Thus, strong families help build healthy personalities. Parents and siblings have a strong influence in molding children to see themselves as either good or bad. When a person’s self-definition is characterized by negative self-esteem, that person has difficulty both in acknowledging positive feedback and in giving it. Strong families cherish their members, show that they are valued, and build self-esteem in their members that can be carried on to the next generation.
Try these things:
- Set a goal of giving each family member at least one compliment per day.
- Create a positive home environment by reframing negative statements into positive ones (instead of saying, “You are always trying to control me,” say “I like how you are concerned about my well-being all the time”).
- Write down ten things you like about each member of your family – and then show them your list.
Dr. Baya Mebarek, Psy.D.,LMFT
www.sandiegofamilytherapy.net
