Developing healthy boundaries

Robert Frost said, “Good fences make good neighbors”. Learning to establish healthy boundaries is liberating, fostering independence and wholeness. When both partners enter a relationship with strong, yet flexible boundaries, true intimacy and equality thrive.

Examples of healthy and unhealthy boundaries in couples:

Example of healthy boundaries:

  • Feeling like your own person
  • Responsibility for your own happiness
  • Balanced togetherness and separateness
  • Maintaining friendships outside the relationship
  • Achieving intimacy through open honest communication
  • Commitment and respect for differences

Examples of unhealthy boundaries in couples:

  • Feeling incomplete without your partner
  • Relying on your partners for happiness
  • A strong togetherness or lack of it
  • Difficulty in establishing and maintaining friendships with others.
  • Focusing on the worst qualities of the partner
  • Using substances for false intimacy
  • Game playing, unwillingness to listen, manipulation.
  • Jealousy, relationship addiction or lack of commitment

Remember, marriage counseling or couples therapy can be instrumental in helping you identify and develop healthy boundaries, ensuring a fulfilling and lasting relationship.

Dr. Baya Mebarek, Psy.D.,LMFT